One Strike and You’re Out!
By Monday, the TV writers may or may not be on strike. Let’s hope they strike and give us some relief from the silly fare they’ve produced for the fall season. I already stocked up on some books, including the latest Ken Follett epic novel.
Most of the hastily-written episodes on TV, especially the various crime and forensic series, have stretched my imagination way past the point of credibility. I finally made the decision to never again watch CSI Miami, despite the impressive cinematography. Horatio’s ridiculous melodrama and the ditzy blonde’s recitation of her lines as if she’s in a grade school play, are just too much for me to take anymore.
I don’t get grossed out by the autopsy mockups on the CSI programs, probably because I know they’ve been created, and the odor factor doesn’t penetrate my TV. Apparently the writers have never been anywhere near a decomposing body, especially one with exposed body cavities, which explains the various personnel standing around talking casually and sometimes eating sandwiches, sipping coffee.
The premises for many of these shows are very weak, and very unbelievable. In one episode we saw a murderer perform a “practice killing,” I guess to see if the intended one would work, or something like that. Doesn’t make any sense.
Even on The Ghost Whisperer, we see a lady taking photos of herself underwater with her cell phone and sending them to her lover. Try it and see if it works.
I’ve also grown tired of the language, some of it pretty much inappropriate, much of it centered around sexual topics or various parts of the anatomy that decent people generally don’t discuss at the dinner table and shouldn’t be subjected to on TV. The “A” word pops up everywhere, including in the monologues of the various comedian/hosts of talk shows. They’ve now migrated to the “P” word. Humor works without either of those, and without many others.
Some, and by some I mean many, shows, whether serious or not, seem to work in drugs, homosexuality, and transgenderism not only as things acceptable to all, but as if they’re just funny little quirks that add a bit of humor to everyday life.
The shoot-‘em-up scenes in some of the programs also offer quite a laugh, with automatic weapons bursting steadily for 30 seconds or more. Some weapons have a bit more staying power than others, but as an example, an M-16 lasts only a couple of seconds on full automatic, a bit longer with a banana clip. Then they show cops qualifying on 45’s and the gun kicks like a pellet gun. I guess that’s why Horatio always goes for the dramatic pose with the gun right in front of his face. He looks ridiculous!
A recent show, and I think it took place in Miami, has a guy strangle someone during a total eclipse, while everyone is looking up at the sun (something that’s not a good idea). Turns out he used a little cable that pulls out from his watch stem knob. Where do you buy one of these watches, and why would anyone make one? The investigators figured out that he had a telescope electronically programmed to pick out his victims. Huh?
Yes, I think the writers need a rest. They must be very tired, churning out stories that don’t make any sense and that usually include all manners of drugs and sex. Or maybe we can just let them go on strike and bring in a fresh batch of writers that actually use their minds and keep them fairly clean.